Thursday, November 17, 2016

What Doesn't Kill Us Makes Us Stronger? Not for Me.

The saying is "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger," yet I feel like the hard things I've been through have made me weaker.  I feel like each loss (of a person or cat) or very difficult life situation has made me less able to cope with it all.  Am I so strange or different from everyone else because I feel so beaten down by things?  I don't know.

For some people, it seems that "what doesn't kill us makes us bitter."  I've seen those people, and I do understand that, too, though I really try not to be that way, of course.

As Mum and I were saying today, we feel that we are surviving, not thriving, since the loss of my sister Kim.  We keep searching for ways to be okay, yet we are not, really.

I'm so very grateful every day for my amazing husband, wonderful mum, and others, but there are still gaping holes in my heart left by the important people we have lost.

I want to be able to offer some hope, some inspiration to people who are going through similar things and who come across this blog, but sometimes it's just really hard. 

I know that loving the people who are here is the main thing.  Also, finding things to focus on for the future is an important thing.  For me, it's the books I am writing and also trying to learn to create some art.  I guess that is all I can recommend, for now.  Love and do and be.

Wishing everyone a heart filled with peace.