Happy Birthday, Kim, and thank you for the signs and the support.
I know it might sound strange, but I do believe that our departed loved ones can send us signs.
For example, a day or so after we had to put down our very sick cat Dino, who we had for many years and loved so much, we were going to Toys R Us and saw the most bright and brilliant pink sunset (my favorite color, when it's not pale). I felt that it was from him, telling us that he was okay.
Last winter, I had to do the shoveling, because my husband has had heart surgery and because we can't afford to pay anyone. We were both worried because of my heart and my back not being strong enough, but when I stepped outside to shovel this deep snow...
...I saw this heart in the snow:
I felt that it was a sign from all of the people we've lost through the years, telling me that they were watching over me and that I was going to be okay, and that they loved us.
Then, a few months ago, we were passing Kim's old apartment on the way to the health food store, which always makes me sad, but we don't try to drive around it or avoid it. So, I was feeling terrible, saying in my head, "Kim, I miss you so much." Then some adorable things happened while we were sitting in the parking lot, before I went in.
First, there was a little bunny - not a baby, but not full-grown. He was so cute, munching on leaves from plants growing on the edge of the parking lot, by a fence. I went inside to get him some shredded carrots from the salad bar. I did see him again, but not while I was sprinkling the carrots around all over onto the plants (he was hiding, of course). Both my best friend Barbara and my husband love bunnies a lot, so it meant a lot to me to see him and leave food for him.
Then there were two women talking in the parking lot and one of them saw the container I was holding, and said, "Oh, I thought you were smelling the purple irises that smell like grapes." So, I went back and smelled them. Actually, they smell like grape soda, not real grapes, but it was amazing. I told the women that those were so incredible! I wouldn't have even seen those women if I hadn't been feeding the bunny first.
Then, when I was getting out of the car to go into the health food store and Dean was driving across the street to get groceries at a regular grocery store (sounds silly, but he had to drive because he had to get bottled water, cat litters, and stuff), there was a beautiful rainbow in the sky. Dean saw it from the car and I saw it from the parking lot, but we both would've missed it if not for the bunny, the carrots, the talking women, and the purple irises. We both would've been inside our stores already.
I felt that all of these things were sent to me by Kim, to comfort me, to let me know she was okay, and that she was thinking of all of us, too.
A short time later, we were heading past Kim's place to go to the health food store again, and I was feeling very sad and wondering, in my head, why can't our dear, departed loved ones help us with all our pain, why can't they send us some love and support or something? Why do Dean and I have to both keep feeling so much pain over our losses?
This time, in the health food store parking lot, we saw the brightest, full-across-the-sky rainbow that we had ever seen (other than in pictures). Everyone was standing in the parking lot saying, "Wow," "Amazing," and thing like that. Again, I felt this was a sign from the people we care about, because it was right when I needed it and asked for it, and it was so beautiful and brilliant, as if they all banded together and created it, for us to see.
I wish I had photos of some of these things, but I only have a flip phone and my husband's smart phone is cheap and doesn't take great photos, and I keep forgetting to bring the camera when we go out.
Also, recently, about two weeks before Kim's birthday, Mum landed on an old Facebook post from Kim (so, from more than 3 years ago), and a couple of days ago I accidentally ended up on a chunk of email from Kim in my "old mail" folder (which contains tens of thousands of old emails). Like I mentioned in a previous post, I suddenly got the urge to delete some old mail (I almost never do that, obviously - that's why it's so full), pulled down once on the scroll bar and landed on emails from Kim, even though that was so unlikely because of the small amount of them that were from her. Also, a few messages down from the oldest one were a couple from her replying to me when I was saying "Happy Birthday Kim!" which today now is, too.
Now, some of you might be saying, "Well, that's just all coincidences," or something like that, but I choose to think it's messages from people, saying hello or that they care or that they love us and are watching over us.
Maybe some of you reading this have had similar experiences, too.