Dr. Kim Saxe I'm sure would have agreed - laughter is the best medicine.
Some of us grieve even harder over the loss of her because of her son. We worry because losing your loving, caring mother at age 5 is just not right. We worry also that he won't remember her enough. I hope some of the things I post here will help him to know her better, when he's a bit older.
Kim's son loves to play video games and laugh a lot. He and I laugh over the silliest things. They usually aren't even that funny, to other people, but for some reason we just crack up and it's the best thing ever.
Kim and I enjoyed that same kind of laughter many times, but I remember one time in particular, back in the apartment days that I mentioned previously, when she was about 11, and I was a bit older. We had to share a bed and one night ended up going to bed at the same time and for some reason were having a real giggling fit. Maybe we were super-tired or who knows what, but we kept busting out laughing over silly things when we were supposed to be sleeping.
One thing that kept happening was we'd both be laughing super-hard, then finally we'd stop and then sigh, and that would start us laughing all over again. Mum yelled from her room for us to shut up and go to sleep because she had to work the next day. Of course, that just made us laugh even more, like when your friend or cousin makes you laugh in church and it's the very last thing you should be doing, but that's why it happens, for some of us silly people.
Anyway, it was a great memory. I only wish Kim's son had had more time to make more of his own memories with her, too. He missed out on a lot, only having her for such a short time. Nothing can replace the hugs, laughter, and love he would get from Kim, if she were here. A mother is a special thing. We all try to help fill the gap. His grandma (our mum) does a lot and is so good with him and good for him. She's devoted incredible amounts of her time and energy to trying to help him to be happy.
Like I've said before, I write these things to help myself, but also to maybe help others who knew Kim, or people going through similar losses. I don't really have any answers for feeling better during grief, other than to cherish the ones who are here, and love and take care of each other during these tough times we experience. That's all we can do, I guess.